Loaner Cellphone/Housefly Crisis

I work for a small-sized company, about 250 employees. For one of my projects, I was required to have a cellphone with me so that I could be contacted at anytime. I preferred to use my own cellphone and just expense any overage minutes I incurred due to work, but no, that was not an option. They insisted I use their "loaner phone." Aaarrrggghhh! What a nightmare!! Who knows whose bad breath, spit, mucus, sputum, filthy hands, possible fecal material (you never know who doesn't wash their hands after using the bathroom) or GERMS were on it? I was quite upset to have to expose myself to this level of potential bacteria.

I was given the filthy thing in a bag, which was good -- less I'd have to handle the germ-infested thing. I brought it home and got out the Lysol cleaner in the spray bottle and a roll of paper towels. I sprayed and wiped, sprayed and wiped, until the black stopped appearing on the paper towels. I looked at the pile of used paper on the counter and skeeved. UGH! I threw them out -- in the big green can in the garage, no sense in having other peoples' airborne germs in my kitchen -- and even though I'm very careful to close the door immediately upon exiting or entering the house from the garage (I saw a lizard in the garage a few years ago and am terrified I'll let him in the house by accident if I'm not careful) somehow let a fly in! This was getting worse and worse.

It was on the kitchen window defecating on my white plantation blinds (I read that every time a fly lands, it either pukes or defecates). I used to kill flies as a child with my mother's Aqua-Net hairspray and watch their wings get hard before they succombed. Then as I got older, I typically used Windex. There was no need for actual bug killer, we rarely had any bugs. I have no Aqua-Net and did not have the Windex out, but I did have the Lysol -- still handy, still on the counter -- so I grabbed it and sprayed the window where the ugly beast was relieving himself. It dropped. Taking advantage of the opportunity, I tore off another sheet of paper towel (Viva only) and cleaned the window, the blinds, the windowsill, it was great. I was not sure if the fly would require another blast to put it out of its misery, but I was amazed -- it was stone cold dead.

Two with one blow! The phone was clean and disinfected, and one less filthy creature could contaminate someone else's house, picnic or barbeque.

It was a magical day.